Glasses

Once I dreamt that the left arm of my glasses was crooked, and I wanted to fix it so that the glasses would fit again. I bent it backwards and forwards twice, and then it snapped off. I held it up to the glasses – it had broken off at the hinge, and could no longer be repaired. What should I do?

I put the glasses on in the hope that they might fit somehow, but they hung diagonally across my face. Everything looked distorted through the lenses, and holding them in place the whole time was extremely uncomfortable. Yet opticians are closed on Sundays. What is the best course of action in a situation like this? I thought for a while. Then I remembered – I’d undergone laser surgery over six months ago to correct my short-sightedness. Why on earth was I still wearing the stupid glasses? And I went about my day without them.

“Glasses” is the transcript of a dream. The aim of the story is to make it clear that we often waste time and energy on maintaining counterproductive ways of seeing and experiencing life. Solutions which involve changing the underlying foundations of our way of thinking may be too close for us to see them.

(From: Stefan Hammel: Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling. Sories and Metaphors in Psychotherapy, Child and Family Therapy, Medical Treatment, Coaching and Supervision, Routledge 2019)

Blasfematorul

I am happy to present another story in Romanian, taken from the Romanian translation of my “Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling”

Când am vizitat marele baptisteriu al Domului din Pisa, mi‑am zis în sinea mea: ce templu comercial au făcut din el!
Îmi repugna faptul că trebuia să plătesc intrarea într‑o biserică, pentru ca apoi să mă trezesc printre sute de turiști temători ca nu cumva să le scape ceva nefotografiat. Unii se uitau la ceas, pentru că o dată pe oră un cântăreț angajat făcea o demonstrație a minunatei acustici.

Oare biserica nu ar trebui să slujească rugăciunii? Ajuns sus, în galerie, m‑am gândit că nu ar fi deloc în neregulă dacă aș consacra acest templu al lui Mamona din nou celui căruia i‑a fost închinat — lui Dumnezeu. Mi‑a făcut curaj, apoi am fost pregătit:
am cântat tare și clar în spațiul deschis: Laudate omnes gentes, laudate Dominum. Acustica a fost într‑adevăr excelentă. În biserică s‑a făcut liniște. Oamenii căutau cu privirea de unde vine cântarea, dar ecoul a făcut dificilă identificarea originii cântării.

Același lucru s‑a întâmplat și cu personalul de pază care se învârtea în căutarea vinovatului. Când strofa s‑a încheiat, cineva m‑a descoperit. A așteptat să încep din nou pentru a mă prinde în flagrant — altfel aș fi putut nega cu ușurință nelegiuirea mea.
Am privit gânditor în sală.
„Mulțumesc“, a spus o femeie de lângă mine. „A fost minunat.“
Și mie îmi făcuse bine cântatul. Când ultimul ecou s‑a stins, am părăsit casa lui Dumnezeu.
I‑am oferit paznicului, care încă se uita fix la mine, cel mai prietenos și mai diabolic zâmbet de care eram în stare.

„Blasfematorul“ ilustrează faptul că este o virtute să îți aperi propriile valori. Atunci când propriile valori intră în conflict cu interesele celorlalți, este adesea necesară găsirea unui echilibru între pledarea în mod public pentru propriile idealuri și apărarea lor într‑un mod mai discret. Povestea poate fi folosită și pentru a încuraja clienții să nu își ascundă sclipirea
și să se prezinte în fața celorlalți conștienți de ropria valoare.

Now available: Romanian translation of my book “Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling”

TREI Cartea care te ajutá  or  Stefan Hammels shop.

Kind regards,

Stefan

The Cave Dwellers

She asked her mother, “Mum, mum, mum, what is real, real, real?”

“What do you mean, what is real, real, real?” “I mean without this echo, echo, echo.” “Which echo, echo, echo?

Right here and now is real, real, real.” “I see, see, see.”

And then she understood, understood, understood.

The story “The Cave Dwellers” demonstrates that what we perceive is determined more by our biology and biography than by objective facts, and that the feedback effects from both our sensory perceptions and our interpretations largely drown out what is allegedly real about the world.

(From: Stefan Hammel: Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling. Sories and Metaphors in Psychotherapy, Child and Family Therapy, Medical Treatment, Coaching and Supervision, Routledge 2019)

The Creation of the World

Mohammed created a world. Freud created a world. Tolkien created a world. McKinsey created a world. The Aldi brothers created a world. Bill Gates created a world. Can I too create a world?

The German company Tchibo uses the advertising slogan, “Every week a new world”. New worlds are indeed created every week. Most of them are not very original; they swim in the wake of the established worlds and do not gain any traction.

What kind of a world have you created? A philosophical world? A spiritual world? A commercial world? A mathematical world? A social world? An aesthetic world? A material world? A communicative world? A world of fun? An ethical world?

You might be thinking to yourself, “But I haven’t created any world at all!” I don’t believe that for a second. As soon as you look at something – anything – and inadvertently think something new, you start to create a world.

“The Creation of the World” makes it clear that all thought systems – and therefore all human ways of interpreting the world – have been devised by humans. We often get the world we think up and believe in; at a personal level, this means that we become what we believe in and what we think, hope and fear.

This rule has far-reaching implications in terms of both our health and our psychological, material, financial and social conditions. We can of course share our individual worlds with others by communicating them verbally and non-verbally, and to a certain extent turn our environment into what we believe it to be. All reality is created on the basis of a communicated and therefore shared world.

.(From: Stefan Hammel: Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling. Sories and Metaphors in Psychotherapy, Child and Family Therapy, Medical Treatment, Coaching and Supervision, Routledge 2019)

Norocul lui Gogu

I am happy to present another story in Romanian, taken from the Romanian translation of my “Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling”

Povestea „Norocul lui Gogu“ ne reamintește faptul că nu întotdeauna suntem capabili să recunoaștem și să acceptăm fericirea, că unii oameni au motivele speciale ca să nu își îmbunătățească situația, că avem nevoie de țeluri pentru care să luptăm și că succesul neașteptat poate fi, la rândul său, copleșitor.

Cineva mi‑a povestit: „Când eram copil, aveam găini și un cocoș căruia îi spuneam Gogu. Cocoșul și găinile alergau în jurul curții, scormonind și ciugulind boabe. Odată am vrut să‑i
facem lui Gogu o bucurie aparte. L‑am pus în mijlocul cutiei cu boabe. Acest lucru ar fi trebuit să însemne raiul pentru orice pasăre! Gogu ședea acum pe mii de boabe delicioase. Ne‑a privit uimit și nu a schițat niciun gest. Nu a mâncat nici măcar un bob.
În cele din urmă, l‑am scos din nou afară, unde, la fel ca mai înainte, a început să scormonească din nou după boabe“.

https://www.edituratrei.ro/carte/stefan-hammel-ghid-de-povestiri-terapeutice-povesti-si-metafore-in-psihoterapie-in-terapia-copilului-si-a-familiei-in-medicina-coaching-si-supervizare/4053/

Now available: Romanian translation of my book “Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling”

TREI Cartea care te ajutá  or  Stefan Hammels shop.

Kind regards,

Stefan

Sacrilege

When I visited the Pisa Baptistry close to the city’s cathedral, I thought to myself, ‘They’ve turned it into a temple to commerce!’ It raised my hackles to pay to enter a church and then find myself surrounded by hundreds of frantic tourists rushing around and taking photographs of everything. Many kept checking their watches, because a singer was paid to perform every hour in order to demonstrate the building’s wonderful acoustics. Should a church not be a place of prayer and devotion? After climbing up to the gallery, I thought, ‘Surely no one will object if I turn this temple to Mammon back into a house of God.’ It took me a while to screw up the courage, but finally I sang the opening line of a psalm loudly and clearly into the open space, ‘Laudate omnes gentes, laudate dominum.’ The acoustics really were superb.

Everything went quiet in the church, and although everyone looked around to find out who was singing, the echoes made it difficult for them to locate me. The security staff searching frantically for the perpetrator also found had a hard task on their hands, but by the end of the verse one had spotted me. He waited for me to start singing again in order to catch me red-handed, since it would otherwise have been easy for me to deny my act of sacrilege. I looked around the building in a daze. “Thank you,” said a woman standing next to me. “That was wonderful.” I too felt better after having sung the psalm. When the last echo had faded away, I left the house of God, giving a sly grin to the security guard who was still watching me.

The story “Sacrilege” illustrates that standing up for your values represents a value in itself. In cases where these values are opposed to the interests of others, it is often necessary to find a balance between defending your ideals in public and taking a less conspicuous approach. The story can also be used to encourage clients not to hide their light under a bushel and to present a self-confident image during interactions with others.

(From: Stefan Hammel: Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling. Sories and Metaphors in Psychotherapy, Child and Family Therapy, Medical Treatment, Coaching and Supervision, Routledge 2019)

Renewed Life

A number of researchers wanted to find out why salmon die after spawning, so they fished a number of specimens out of the river, fitted them with radio transmitters and placed them back into the sea. And what do you think happened? The animals stayed alive.

The story “Renewed Life” makes it clear that life plans and goals play a vital role in an individual’s happiness, health and life expectancy.

(From: Stefan Hammel: Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling. Sories and Metaphors in Psychotherapy, Child and Family Therapy, Medical Treatment, Coaching and Supervision, Routledge 2019)

Story: “Gockle’s Good Luck”

Someone once told me, “When I was growing up my family kept hens and a cockerel named Gockle. The cockerel and the hens ran around in the yard together, scratching and pecking at grains. Once we decided to give Gockle a special treat, and so we picked him up and put him down right in the middle of the box where the grain was stored. That must have been heaven on earth to a chicken! Yet even though Gockle was now standing on thousands upon thousands of tasty grains, he simply looked at us with a surprised expression and did nothing. He did not eat a single grain. Finally we took him outside again, where he scratched and searched for grains like he had before.”

The story “Gockle’s Good Luck” reminds us that we cannot always recognise and accept happiness and that some people have reasons of their own for not improving their situation. It also reminds us that we need goals for which we fight and that unexpected success may overtax our capacities. In conversation with parents, for example, the story can be used to make it clear that children and teenagers should not be allowed to become accustomed to taking an affluent lifestyle for granted, and that they need to experience achieving success and possessions through their own efforts. The story can also be used to alert listeners to the fact that they are taking skills for granted and overlooking opportunities for action, even though – or perhaps because – they are present in abundance.

(From: Stefan Hammel: Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling. Sories and Metaphors in Psychotherapy, Child and Family Therapy, Medical Treatment, Coaching and Supervision, Routledge 2019)

“A doua viață” / “Second Life”

I am happy to present another story in Romanian, taken from the Romanian translation of my “Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling”

https://www.edituratrei.ro/carte/stefan-hammel-ghid-de-povestiri-terapeutice-povesti-si-metafore-in-psihoterapie-in-terapia-copilului-si-a-familiei-in-medicina-coaching-si-supervizare/4053/

Traducere din limba germană de: Diana Rotaru/ Translation from German by: Diana Rotaru

Povestea „A doua viață“ demonstrează faptul că fericirea, sănătatea și speranța de viață depind de măsura în care o persoană își poate defini un plan de viață și niște finalități.

The story “Second Life” demonstrates that happiness, health and life expectancy depends on the extent to which a person can define his or her a life plan and goals.

A doua viață

Câțiva cercetători au dorit să știe de ce mor somonii după reproducere. Au pescuit câteva vietăți din râu, le‑au atașat un transmițător și le‑au dat drumul înapoi în mare. Și ce credeți:
peștii au trăit mai departe.

source: https://pixabay.com/de/photos/lachs-fische-springen-stromaufw%c3%a4rts-1107404/

Second Life

Some researchers wanted to know why salmon die after reproduction. They fished a few fish out of the river, attached a transmitter and released them back into the sea. And what do you think: The fish lived on.

Now available: Romanian translation of my book “Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling”

TREI Cartea care te ajutá  or  Stefan Hammels shop.

Kind regards,

Stefan

My Aim in Life

“My aim in life is to leave as much healing and joy in my wake as possible,” I said to a friend. “That’s a lofty goal,” he said. “I’m happy if I can avoid causing too much harm.”

The story “My Aim in Life” calls into question the absoluteness of existing life goals, and encourages the listener to formulate his or her own values.The story “Renewed Life” makes it clear that life plans and goals play a vital role in an individual’s happiness, health and life expectancy.

(From: Stefan Hammel: Handbook of Therapeutic Storytelling. Sories and Metaphors in Psychotherapy, Child and Family Therapy, Medical Treatment, Coaching and Supervision, Routledge 2019)